Live a Life Full of Purpose

The title of this article speaks for itself, Live a life full of purpose.  While that is simple to write and even more simple to say, it’s not that simple of a thing to do. Many of us, including myself float down the river of life going from one thing to another and seldom find our real purpose.  Have you ever asked that of yourself.

What is my purpose in Life?

One day while I was at work and talking to a good friend of mine, he gave me this quote about the Purpose of Life. I have known Joe Lewis for many years and he is passionate about life.  He believes in treating people right, spending time with family, love and hard work.  Joe said, “The Purpose of Life is to Live a Life Full of Purpose.”

Thank you Joe Lewis for being a wonderful friend.

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I believe each of us have times in our life when we find ourselves helping others or lending a helping hand. It may be in the form of giving financial help or in some way helping another with our skills or talents.  The one thing that gives credence to that word Purpose is when we are in that helping mode.

Simon Sinek who is the author of Start With Why has said, “Working hard for something we don’t care about is called stress, working hard for something we love is called passion.”

What is it that you love to do?  What is it that you can do that gives you that feeling of accomplishment?  Overwhelmingly we find that helping others gives most people an adrenaline rush on life.  My mentor Les Brown loves helping people and he has found his passion in doing so.  It took Les years to discover that his passion was in helping others overcome adversity.  He speaks all over the world with motivation and inspiration in telling his own story of how he overcame his own obstacles in life and now he relates to others in how they also can overcome adversity.  Les began work as a sanitation worker and later on rose to a Radio Personality then discovered that he was really good at inspiring others.  He failed numerous times but got up each time to tell others that they could do the same.  Les says, “If you fall, try to fall on your back ’cause if you can look up then you can get up!” Getting up in life is the message he has, that is his passion.

My Father is a Pastor and he has found his passion in leading the flock of our Church.  Our Church, “CornerStone House of Prayer” is a small church located in the Appalachain Mountains of Virginia.  He says that anyone that comes through the doors is already a member and he loves them like he has known them all of his life.  I have to say he is truly a Loving Pastor and many could learn a lot from him in how he exudes in his love. He finds his purpose in his teaching about God and how we can form a relationship with our heavenly father.

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It may not make sense to others but if it makes you happy and it brings happiness to others, it is a worthwhile purpose.  Some things don’t make sense, like why do butterflies find just the right person to land on and that person ends up smiling and standing still for a moment.  One day my mother was standing on her porch and a hummingbird was in flight right in front of her face. It stayed there for a few seconds and it gave my mother delight.  Why did that hummingbird do that?  It had a purpose at the right moment.  My mother has told that story countless times.  If it makes you happy, it had purpose.

Joe Lewis is a one of a kind who is yet no different than the inner self that we each have. He laughs, he cries, he thinks and he is a human that is a joyful.  I was reading a facebook post of his and it went so well with this piece that I just had to include it just as it was written.

Joe Lewis-FaceBook Post 3-8-2020

“Sometimes you have to slow down, wait for your initial reaction to subside, and take it all in. This is personal growth and wisdom attained ,and it’s such a huge part of what I am working on.On my way home from work I recognized I was in a bad mood and was a bit hangry so I stopped by Taco Bell drive through intending to eat while recalibrating before I got home. As I’m waiting a little red girly car parks in the parking lot blasting hip hop at an ear shattering volume. My initial reaction was to get out of my car and march over and yell Turn that expletive down!”. I refrained and seconds later out pops 4 apparently by their shirts college softball players dancing and singing out of tune. Watching 4 white girls trying to dance to hip hop struck me as funny so I started chuckling. I had my window down getting this nice warm air and they saw me laughing and they started laughing. When I finally got to the pay window I saw them dancing at the counter and I kept chuckling. As I parked and ate my meal I started thinking “ 20 years down the road these young ladies will look back on this time as the best times of their lives. Because I held my temper today the immense joy they were displaying carried over to me and brought some joy to my heart from a much needed laugh. Those young ladies had no way of fathoming where I had just spent my last 12 hours, and they surely will never know how much I needed to see something that at first was annoying, but ended up being a big lift. The saying stop and smell the roses applies this evening.So often supermaximum security Correctional Officers fail to see a much needed good because all we see behind the walls is evil. SLOW DOWN and open your eyes and hearts my brothers and sisters.”

Sure, I’m making writing this article in a selfish way and turning it all toward being happy and helping others.  That is what I find in my purpose. Creating an atmosphere of happiness and encouragement.  That’s why the name of my website is, ThePowerOfPositiveSpeaking.com.  I am Eddie Kilbourne and thank you for stopping by.

The Need For A Mentor

The Need for a Mentor

Everywhere you look today there are broken families. This includes broken mothers, broken fathers and yes broken children. There are many reasons that families don’t remain together today and I don’t think that any family began with a break-up in mind. It happens and we to often take it blindly that it’s normal. It may be common place but it’s not normal.hands-holding-mentor-000035379134_medium.jpg

According to an article by NPR dated June 18, 2017,“there are 24.7 million kids in the U.S. that don’t live with a biological father.” That’s not to say that all fathers are the ideal family maker, sometimes their not. With this in mind, I believe more fathers need to learn how to be better fathers. Our modern day and time often asks that the Father or even the Mother work long hours and be away from the dinner table more often than not. When one of the parents is not available, the children lose a huge portion of guidance and direction and then set the example for their own children that this is the way it should be.

 

This same NPR report also says that children are 4 more times likely to be poor if the Father is not around. It goes on to say that Fatherless kids are also twice as likely to drop out of school.

The facts state that 7 out of 10 high school drop outs are fatherless.

Why all this talk about the Father? It’s because most of the time when a family breaks, it is the father that leaves. The mother is looked at as the natural caretaker and while most everyone agrees with this, it is unfair to the family as a whole. Anytime the family splits apart it affects everyone. Our goal should be to keep the family together.

Is this to say that families should stay together when for instance the father is abusive or addicted or maybe the mother has her own issues and the family feels the need to part their ways. Overall, at least 50% of couples will remain together if they get counseling and as they grow older together they learn to deal with each others differences. Does this mean they should suffer together until they get over it. Not really, couples that have children have made a commitment to them morally and they should try all that they can in order to remain together. They have to remember why they connected in the first place or were married. I am a huge believer in marriage rather than living together because it is a commitment of the heart.

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If we as a people don’t have morals then we will see a decline in every aspect of our humanity.

So as not to digress as to what this writing is about, we need to focus on the need for mentor ship for our children and young adults. This mentor ship is from both parents but this article will address the need for a Father Mentor or a Male Mentor.

On the website Fatherhood.org there is an article that is interestingly similar to the need for mentor ship in elephants. It was in Kruger National Park in South Africa where an entire herd of elephants was being transplanted to a different area due to the numbers of elephants in the environment. The harnesses that were being used to airlift the animals would not lift the large male elephants and only the young females and small elephants could be transported by helicopter. After they elephants were relocated, the young male elephants began to show unelephant like behavior. They began to terrorize other animals, even goring their neighboring rhinos to death. The female elephants could not control the young males and had no influence over them. Older male elephants were brought in and they immediately began to mentor the young elephants. It appeared that without that father figure in their lives they would allow a gang type mentality to rule their attitudes.
In this story about the elephants, it was a human oversight or mistake that left the father out of the program. When the mentor elephants were brought back in to the family, it created a normal atmosphere and one with discipline and leadership. The same goes for our human families that have been separated for whatever reason.
I work in a prison and the remarks that I hear concerning families is heartbreaking. There was one inmate in our kitchen that always did a great job and I often bragged on him. He told me one day how much he appreciated me letting him know that he had done well and he said, “I never got that from home.” He went on to tell me that they only words he received from his father were words of hate and anger. He said that type of role model is what landed him in prison. He thought it was normal to hit and use violence against someone for not getting your way. Who failed this young man? Was it his father or was it society as a whole? Have we neglected our moral responsibility to teach fathers how to be mentors? Was it a family issue that was handed down from generation to generation?

We as a society have to take the responsibility for some things. How do we remove hate and anger from our speech? How do we show our children that we need to express respect and honor? How do we bring back the golden rule in treating others the way that we want to be treated?

This is the Goal!! This should be our purpose!!!
Become involved in a Mentoring program in your area.hands-holding-mentor-000035379134_medium.jpg

Tomorrows Success is Defined by….

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Have you considered what Success is and what it isn’t?

I have worked, in my career, for men who were considered millionaires. Two of my previous employers were men who started from humble beginnings. Through hard work and good decisions they were able to grow their businesses to a level where their hard work paid off and they became financially well off. They were good examples of rags to riches and both of them had the same habits and mindset which enabled them to persist and pursue until they became millionaires.

Is becoming a millionaire a sign of success? Sure it is, but it took a lot of good decisions and hard work along with diligence in savings to amass that amount of money. To become a millionaire it takes a lot of small successes in many other things.

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For years I had the idea that I wanted to be an author of this very type of article that you are reading right now. I have always carried a small notebook and written down ideas and notes on what it takes to succeed in any endeavor that a person desires to enter. Then a few years ago, I sat down and created this site, ThePowerOfPositiveSpeaking.com. The hard part of any endeavor is the Start-Up. We all have dreams of what we want, ideas of great things we wish to do, many of us even have blueprints or plans in our head. My Mentor Zig Ziglar said that Goals without written down plans are only dreams.

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Many of you know for years I was one of the Leading Photographers in Southwest Virginia. I began as a young man just enjoying taking photographs and then had a desire to increase my hobby to one that would sustain itself. I sat down one day and wrote a business plan to become a School Photographer. I did this for several years and had 5 school contracts. I didn’t just fall into the business, I had to work at it with many small successes. Many Small Wins Lead To Big Success. Napoleon Hill is quoted as saying, “Our only limitations are those we set up in our minds.” To be a success at anything it is imperative that you have a goal in your mind. That goal becomes reality when you write it down.
My Father in Law has carried a blueprint in his wallet for many years of a business that he created, the structure that he built and the idea that was in his mind. He is proud of that little piece of napkin that his idea took seed in.
Are you a dreamer or a doer.

To be a success, you have to be a doer.

Doing things, even small things progressively will get you from Start to Finish.

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Everyone of those Millionaires that I spoke about started with an idea. Everyone of them started with a goal written down and a desire to complete that goal. Then everyday that individual would work on the idea that would eventually get them to Success. Neither of them had the goal of becoming financially independent, each of them had the idea to have a business that they enjoyed and one they could make a living at.
I posted a note on Social Media of a little competition and asked the question on-line.
I started a poster with the words, “Tomorrows Success Is Determined By_________”.   The idea was to get others to participate in what they thought would be a good quote on success. I received many Great Quotes and some funny ones also. I appreciate each of these and hope that each one will know that I really considered their words of wisdom.

Many of those responded with words like Today’s Struggles or The Failures that we go through today. These are very appropriate ideas, not only appropriate but Necessary Examples of what we must go through to reach success. I don’t know anyone who was a success the very first time.

 

Babe Ruth, in 1923, broke the record for most home runs in a season but he also broke another record that year which was more strike outs than any other player in the Major Leagues. Babe Ruth wasn’t afraid to strike out or better yet, he wasn’t afraid to swing the bat.Einstein.jpg

We have to be bold enough to step to the plate, put the bat in our hand, face the ball coming our way, and swing just when we think it’s the right time. If we miss, we get another chance. That second chance gives us more favor to succeed. We now know the speed of the ball, we understand the weather may be against us and we adjust our stance, we don’t give up.

This is what Success is, giving our all and not giving up.

When a Girl Scout is challenged with selling a box of cookies, let her do it. Parents get tied up withGirl Scouts.jpg selling the cookies for the Scouts and this doesn’t teach them success. Let them brave the cold, allow them to design their speech, encourage them to knock on one more door. When we do this, we just may be looking at the next Mrs. President.

I was at a Photography Seminar one time and the Speaker told the group to study Napoleon Hill. I didn’t know who this was but I wrote the name down and soon after that I was in an antique store and found a book by Napoleon Hill titled, “The Law of Success”. I purchased the book and it took me over a year to read it but what I got out ofNapHill Book.jpg that book was nothing less than astounding. Hill talked about success the entire book and how we are all capable of success if we will have the get up and go to get what we want. He talks about having a Burning Desire for what it is that we want. So there you go folks. Here is the idea of what it takes to gain success. DETERMINATION to complete the Goal.

The Social Media Poster that I have created was inspired by everyone who responded and I thank you so much. The ones who talked about Determination captured the soul of the poster. What a joy and what fun this posting has been.

Tomorrows Success2.png  Thanks to the following:

Donnie N Becky Pickett

Tasha Peterson

Tammy Owens

Gail Dotson

Julie McKinney Rogers

Linda Nidiffer

Please share this post with your friends and follow this post.  There are other stories and articles that you may enjoy.

God Bless you. “Good Things Are In Your Future”

Written by Eddie Kilbourne 2-12-2020

 

Master Your Fear Master Your Future

Posted by Eddie Kilbourne on Monday, 3 February 2020

 

Fear Can’t Hurt You, When You’re a Child of God

A little boy was afraid of dark. One night his mother told him to go out to the back porch and bring her the broom. The little boy turned to his mother and said, “Mama, I don’t want to go out there. It’s dark.”
The mother smiled reassuringly at her son. “You don’t have to be afraid of the dark,” she explained. “Jesus is out there, He’ll look after you and protect you.”
The little boy looked at his mother real hard and asked,
“Are you sure he’s out there?”
“Yes, I’m sure . He is everywhere, and he is always ready to help you when you need him.” she said.
The little boy thought about that for a minute and then went to the back door and cracked it a little. Peering out into the darkness, he called,
“Jesus, Jesus……? If you’re out there, would you please hand me the broom?”

 

What are you Afraid of ?

We are born with only two innate fears; the fear of falling and the fear of surprises such as bright lights or loud sounds. All other fears we learn through hunger, joy or pain.

 

The Cigarette Lighter

I remember one time when I was very young, mom had ran an errand to town and just for a minute she told me to wait in the car and she would be right back. Back in the day it wasn’t so bad to leave your kid in the car for a minute because the windows were always down, we didn’t have air conditioning. I was sitting there and I pushed in the cigarette lighter.
For you young folks it was a small metal thing that had coils of wire on the inside and when you pushed it in, it heated up and when it popped out it was hot.

I was maybe 8 or 9 years old and curious about a lot of things.
I wasn’t afraid of that cigarette lighter it had never caused me pain so I pushed it in and waited. In about 20 seconds it popped out and I reached for it and turned it around to see what had happened. Folks it was so pretty and bright and glowing orange light.

So what do you think a curious boy would do? You’re right, I held it up and stuck my thumb to it. Hot Dog, it was hot. My thumb went immediately to my mouth and it was crispy dry with blister already. I rocked back and forth and did the pain dance right there in that seat. It hurt, and there was nothing that I could do to get that pain to stop and then here came my mom. I never told her what happened but I kept my thumb in my mouth all the way home and then carried a cup of water around for the rest of the evening with my thumb in it. Folks, I can tell you to this day, I am afraid of a orange glowing cigarette lighter. It caused some pain, don’t bring it near me.

That came from a negative, hurting experience didn’t it.

Many of our fears are self made and come from the recesses of our minds.

The Dentist
When I was young I use to go to a dentist who was pretty rough with me and he hurt me a few times and when I got a little older it was years before I went back to a dentist. Later when I did go, I explained to my new dentist about my fears and he was great to take every precaution to not cause me any pain or anxiety. I never saw a dental needle and he gave me that laughing gas and he was so kind. I had let the fear of my youth take root in my mind. That fear almost got the best of me.

What are you Afraid of ?

Friends, my oldest son has a fear of clowns.

I have a cousin who is over 6′ tall and he is a big man but he is afraid of butterflies.

The research says that most fears are the result of a past bad experience and your body and mind are already conditioned to fight that fear with a way to avoid it.

My largest fear in my life use to be the fear of public speaking. That is the number one fear of 75% of all individuals. #2-heights, #3-bugs or snakes.
The list goes on but this shows that everybody has a fear.
Fears are real to those that have them, and we have to go through things.
They aren’t funny and we should Never laugh or take advantage of someone with a Fear.

The question is how do we face our fears and conquer them?

My Mentor Zig Ziglar says FEAR is an acronym for

False
Evidence
Appearing
Real

And even as the tough guy or tough gal we act to be most of the time, we have FEARS.
Many of our fears are legitimate in life. The fear of being lonely which often is real, or the fear of poor health, or the fear of loss of finances.

The one thing I know is that Christ told us not to Fear in that he would always be with us and never leave us and I know for certain that I find comfort in that.

Fear is first mentioned in the bible in Genesis just after the fall.

Gen 3:9-10
9 And the LORD God called unto Adam, and said unto him, Where art thou?
10 And he said, I heard thy voice in the garden, and I was afraid, because I was naked; and I hid myself.

What were they afraid of? Adam and his wife Eve had just ate from the
Tree of Knowledge of good and evil of which God had commanded them that they should not do. Adam said it, “God, I was naked and was afraid and hid myself.”
You see he was out of connection with God and the fact that he was naked and he now realized this, he felt disconnected from God.
He did what God told him not to.

The Hebrew word for not doing what God tells us is Hattah. It means disconnected from God. It can also mean on the wrong path or as an example it means miss the mark or the goal.
There are many children living in abusive homes. That’s all they have ever known and they think it’s normal. As they get older they adopt this behavior and the cycle begins again. They grew up with a fear of abuse and not many of them break the cycle and they become the abuser.

Bad relationships, where one spouse will abuse the other leads to fear in many ways and many don’t want to leave that relationship because fear of no relationship. God doesn’t want you to be abused as a Child or a Spouse. Speak to someone if that is you.

Fear of just being out in the public or going to the grocery store can actually cripple some people. And though we don’t understand always how this person obtained this fear, it can be REAL to them.

What can we do?  What can we do?

Ps 56:3-4 3 Whenever I am afraid , I will trust in You.
4 In God (I will praise His word), In God I have put my trust;
I will not fear. What can flesh do to me?

When a person becomes a Christian, God gives him or her a new heart and a new mind. The bible tells us to become a new person and to leave our previous character and to take on the Character of God. Often times we may think, I don’t know how to live a life pleasing to God.
In Genesis 15:1, Abraham was afraid and told God “I’m Afraid”, and listen to what God told him.
“Fear not Abram, I am thy shield and they exceedingly great reward.”

Daniel in Chapter 10:10-12 Daniel had prayed for three weeks and he had a fear about him and God spoke and said, “12 Fear not, Daniel: for from the first day that you prayed, I heard you. I have come because of your words.

2 Things God Wants Us To Do
It’s hard not to try to solve our problems ourselves but God wants us to do two things. Number one he wants us to make the right choices in the things that we do on a daily basis and number two he wants us to put our faith in him.
Stand Still and allow him to fight our battles.

Fear takes place in the mind. Think about it folks, when we are afraid we are thinking about that thing. We live and relive the thing and the outcome. Then it becomes worry. We can’t get it off our mind.

In Matthew 6, 25:34 Jesus tells us multiple times, “Do Not Worry”
Therefore I say to you Do Not Worry about your life, what you will eat or what you will wear. Life is more important than these. Look at the birds of the air, they don’t sow or reap or gather into barns yet your heavenly father feeds these.
Are you not more valuable than they?

Three more times Jesus says, “Do not worry, Do not worry, Do not worry.”

Matt 6:33 But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.
Maybe it’s not a bad choice that we made, maybe it’s a bad choice that someone else made and it affects us, maybe it’s a health issue that we have no control over and the Doctors tell us they don’t know what to do.
We have to continue to press on with faith and even be that role model for our fellow brothers and sisters and when those times come that the end is near we still profess Christ and his love.

Moses had the same fear that I use to have had which is public speaking.
When God called Moses to do a work for him which was to go into Egypt and tell the Pharaoh to let the Children of Israel go free, this gave Moses such a fear that he told God, “I can’t do that!!”

Exodus 4:10
10 Moses said to the Lord, “Pardon your servant, Lord. I have never been eloquent, neither in the past nor since you have spoken to your servant. I am slow of speech and tongue.”
11 The Lord said to him, “Who gave human beings their mouths? Who makes them deaf or mute? Who gives them sight or makes them blind?Is it not I, the Lord?
12 Now go; I will help you speak and will teach you what to say.”

 

Should Christians never be afraid?

That’s a good question and we still have fears.
I believe what we should do is to pause when we are afraid and talk to God.

Moses and the Red Sea:
Moses had led the Israelites out of bondage and they were fleeing Egypt and they had made it to the Red Sea and they couldn’t get across the water. They didn’t know what to do and God set it up to give them an example of what any one should do when a fear is facing them.

When you have a Great Fear in your life, do what Moses did.

Ex 14:13
13 And Moses said to the people, “Do not be afraid. Stand still, and see the salvation of the LORD, which He will accomplish for you today. And the Egyptians you see today you will never see again.
14 This day the Lord will fight for you, you only need to be still.”

 

Ps 56:3-4 3 Whenever I am afraid , I will trust in You.
4 In God (I will praise His word), In God I have put my trust;
I will not fear. What can flesh do to me?

But there is a secret that the world needs to hear.

When you open your bible to the book of Romans 8:15 it reads:

Romans 8:15
15 For you did not receive the spirit of bondage again to fear, but you received the Spirit of adoption by whom we cry out, “Abba, Father.”

That is Hebrew for My Daddy, My Father.

How do we do this in English we simply stop and say,
“My God, My Father, hear me.” Hey God, I need you.

Luke 12:32
32 “Do not fear, little flock, for it is your Father’s good pleasure to give you the kingdom.

 

Proverbs 3:5-8
“Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the LORD and shun evil. This will bring health to your body and nourishment to your bones”

1 Peter 5:7 says “ Cast all your worries on him because he cares for you.”

Philippians 4:13 – “I can do all things through him who strengthens me.”

Psalm 55:22 – “Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.”

Here is what Jesus said in John 14:1, “Let not your hearts be troubled. Believe in God; believe also in me.

 Worry and Fear. These are the result of mans knowledge of Good and Evil.

If there is one thing that I can convince you today it is this. Do all that you can to live right and to treat others the way that you want to be treated. This is the ultimate law of God.

Phil. 4:
5 Let your gentleness be known to all men. The Lord is at hand.
6 Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God;
7 and the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.

(This writing was a Sermon that was delivered at the CornerStone House of Prayer in Big Stone Gap, Virginia on 2-9-2020)

Eddie Kilbourne

Define Your Day by The Words You Speak

There is a certain Scripture that reads, “Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit”.     Proverbs 18:21

 The words we speak come from our heart and show others our soul.

Several years ago I started a little challenge with myself concerning how I responded to others on any given day of the week when they asked the common question or greeting.

“How are you today?” That is such a wide stated question any more and one that we almost always have a generic reply.

I’m doing fine today, thank you. If it were Friday, I would be better. Under the circumstances, I’m doing OK.  We can reply to the other person in just about any way and most of the time they won’t even hear us.

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So I decided to challenge myself to reply with a word that started with the same letter of that day. For example, I might say on Monday that I am marvelous or on Tuesday I might be terrific.  I hope you see how this works and how you could pick any positive word to fill in the challenge.

Isn’t it amazing that we can Define our Day by the words we speak.  How often do you get up in the morning and just don’t feel like getting out of bed or you may be under the weather a bit and really feel like complaining to someone.

I have found that we are snared by the words we speak. (That’s a scripture also found in Proverbs 6:2) But if we will rephrase our words to how we want to feel, that will become our defining moment of the day. 

I’m pretty much a positive person as you well know but sometimes I go over the top. I don’t always do this for others, I do this for me.  I want to enjoy my day and I want others to be encouraged and uplifted when I speak with them or come into their presence.

I can remember when I was young and wanted to lay out of school for a day. I would get up that morning and tell my mother that I didn’t feel well and needed to stay home. I would often have to follow that up by visually showing her that I didn’t feel well by scrunching my face to look like I was in pain or I would cough in order to prove to her that I was sick. This became reality when my body and mind saw it. Medical Scientists tell us that we actually have the ability to tell ourselves we are getting sick or getting well.  Many studies have been done with Placebos where a study was done with a pill given to a person and told that the pill would make them better. In many documented cases the person was given a sugar pill instead of medicine. They were told by the physician that they were getting better and soon they showed signs of healing. This has been done with anxiety and even cancers.

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Yes, we can tell ourselves that we are getting well and have a great attitude about it and often times our bodies cells pick up on this attitude and it boosts the healing process.

So not to go into that much more, I wanted to increase my daily verbal challenge. I have a good friend named Arlene K who I have also challenged to come up with positive words to meet the day. She shared with me today that Tuesday is Testimony day! I really like that. The bible tells us that many are healed by our Testimony and what a Great idea she had with that. Then she told me that Monday can be Miracle Monday.  I have another friend who took the same idea and said Friday would be Fantastic or Freaky Friday because she was preparing for the weekend.  

How about taking the Challenge for yourself. Keep it positive and uplifting for others.

Christ said that we would give account for every word that we speak.  He said that what comes out of the mouth proceeds from the heart. Let’s make our heart good and encourage others with the fruit of our lips.

Has anyone ever given you an ill word and it pierced your own heart? Do you know that children are most affected by the words we speak. I’m guilty of being negative with my children when they were growing up and I had to correct myself.  Often when a child does something wrong we are fast to punish them and slow to correct them with kindness. I have found that a child needs love and encouragement along with discipline in the right direction. Never tell a child that they are stupid or that they will never be this or that. You can direct a childs path by speaking words of life to that child.

So as it is with Children, it is the same with a Team or with a work crew. Speak well of each other and don’t gossip, tell someone each day how much you appreciate them and do tell your family that you Love them.

Until next time……… God Bless and may your Sunday be Super, may your Monday be Motivational and your Tuesday be Totally Terrific.  Keep it going!!!!!

 

Decide to Make a Difference

Do we really understand that statement? When we hear “Make a Difference”, what is it that we want to be different about? If the economy is good and the weather is good should we try to make it different? If our health is good and the neighbors relationship is good and the local ball team hasn’t lost a game, what can that statement mean to us?

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Consider this, would you agree that in any situation your presence can make a difference for better or worse?

Many people want to be different and they show up every day just to make things worse. It may be that they really don’t have that as a goal but because of their selfishness or greed they may make the wrong choices or decisions. They may have the wrong thing in mind. I know a fellow who is very friendly and very intelligent and he literally can do anything. He can rebuild an engine, he can take apart a computer and put it back together, he knows a lot about everything. He knows he is very smart and he usually shows it at the worst times. This fellow might be at a breakfast where two people are discussing an issue and he will overhear them and immediately interject his own thoughts without being asked. We can call him a difference maker right?

We all have friends like that and although they really don’t mean to be obnoxious they can’t help themselves. If he could only realize that he is making a negative difference instead of a positive difference.

I have another friend who is always thinking of others. She always knows the right thing to say and never discusses other peoples business. She will often send a card to a friend who may be down or bake some cookies to take to another. She has an unseen force called “Goodness” that makes a difference in peoples lives.

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Being a difference maker is an attitude. We should all adopt that attitude that whatever we do we will do it for good and be considerate of others. You might have good intentions to perform your job well today or to go the extra mile and help someone in their job but I have to urge you that often times you may have the right state of mind but the wrong state of time. Not all battles belong to us. I was in a roadside market one day when a little boy was crying for a bag of candy and the father was paying him no attention. In the fathers hands were a loaf of bread, a pack of lunch meat, a bag of chips and a large jog of ice tea. The child only wanted a small bag of candy and I took it upon myself to make a difference. I offered to purchase the child that bag of candy and the father told me that the boy didn’t need it. I went on to insist that it would be OK that I had some extra change and I was happy to purchase it. The father abruptly told me his son was diabetic. Do you see where my action would have been very dangerous for this child? However it was the attitude that I had and that father did tell me he appreciated what I was trying to do.

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Let’s determine in our mind that the people we encounter today and the places that we visit will be better off because we were there. Let’s be well aware that each decision that we make can and will impact the lives of others. I had a person to tell me one time that they had been watching me for weeks. That took me by surprise but then they went on to tell me that they were looking for someone with good character and good attitude to give advice on a matter. I hold that person as a dear friend today and we often share ideas.

The attitude of making a difference is powerful and the person that controls that power is you. Being a difference maker is not something that you have to force on others, just be there for them in their time of need. Look for the little things that you can do or the help you can give. It may be only a phone call to that person who feels lonely today but that can make a difference in their life.
Decide today to make a positive difference in the lives of others.

 

One Small Thing

One small thing can change the world. Can you think of small things that changed the path of mankind. How about the wheel, it allowed traffic and moving large things very long distances. Consider the sail that when attached to a ship could capture the energy of the wind and propel that ship across the vast ocean or how about the rudder beneath that ship which turns that huge ship in the direction that the Captain or Navigator would like to go. That rudder is very small in comparison to the sail and that ship but it commands the direction in which way it will go.

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When I was a boy in the days without car air conditioning we would drive with the windows down and I would put my arm out the car and flatten it out and if I would tip my hand up or down just a little, the wind would force my arm up. How many of you have ever done this?

Our own actions can also direct the outcome of a situation. Our deeds that we perform for others or ourselves are powerful. The things that we say and the words we use are ThePowerOfPositiveSpeaking.com .  One Small Thing is the least you can do.

           Yesterday while going to eat breakfast with my parents at a local restaurant something happened that brought this idea to mind. I had just parked where I could see my parents pull in and when they parked I got out of my truck. The parking lot wasn’t full and there wasn’t many vehicles traveling through it either. I had just got to the cross walk and another truck with one single person in that truck was pulling in. He was coming my way and would have been past me in just a few seconds but instead he stopped and motioned for me to go on with a wave of his hand. One small thing, one small gesture that really had it not happened wouldn’t have made much of a difference.

It didn’t take much effort but it did take one single decision by the guy in the truck.
I don’t know who he was and may never see him again but his action made an impact on me. It made me realize that Good Deeds are still alive.

                 Even the smallest of things can affect the lives of others.

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I really believe in the Pass It On Effect. I don’t like calling it karma because it’s an attitude that you have to believe in and participate in. You have to become a part of the movement in order to truly feel its effects. Sure he did something for me but he also reaped the benefits. When you do a noble deed, you brighten someones day. Helping others also does some things for you that you might not know. There is a small chemical in the brain called Dopamine that is released when you do a good deed. This chemical makes you feel good about yourself but it also does a great deal more than that. It also reduces stress and lowers your blood pressure. When you see accomplishment in your good deed your brain then releases Oxytocin and Serotonin that give you a natural high and makes you feel good about yourself and in general all things appear in a better light. Then there is that chemical called Endorphin which is like an energy booster in your soul. By doing Just One Small Thing, you reap the benefits in such a great way, but what about the other person. What does doing a good deed for a stranger do for that stranger? Well I’m glad you asked that question because this is what I really want to talk about. When you do One Small Thing for someone else, they also get the chemical rush of all of those brain super chemicals. They get an attitude of Hope and many of those individuals will pass it on to the next person. In turn One Small Thing can change the world.

Small things can lead to bigger things. Consider opening the door for the next person in line and allow them to go first. Help someone load their groceries, allow that car on the side road to exit. Shake someone hand and tell them how nice they look. Pay for someones meal in line when they don’t know it and don’t reveal it to anyone. There is inside of you a Super Hero called Lady or Gentleman, let’s introduce that person to the world.

I know by not you are thinking about what One Small Thing you can do for someone, I would like to know also. If you want to send me a note, I would love to hear from you. You can click the comments on my Web Site or send me an email to SendMailToEddie@Gmail.com

ThePowerOfPositiveSpeaking.com; The Power Of Positive Speaking; The Power Of Positive Speaking. com; The power of positive speaking web site.

Who Do They Say You Are?

 

Rep Follows You

I am a Photographer in my local town. We are in the Season of Christmas and I have been taking Santa Pictures for a local business. A young boy came in while we were photographing and asked me if I was Eddie Kilbourne. I guess he knew of my work or something about me. I have taken photographs in this town for years and have Posters and Images everywhere. I replied to him that I was and being the curious guy that I am I asked him what he knew about me being Eddie Kilbourne. He said, “You are a really good photographer”.  With this on my mind I was curious as to what else he knew of me and I asked him if he thought I was a good guy. He said, “Yes, everyone knows you and likes you.” That really made me feel good.

Have you ever stopped to think what others think and know about you.  There was a time in my life that I wasn’t very proud of who I was and I decided to change me. I began to be a person of good character and to make good honest decisions and actions first in my life. It didn’t happen overnight but I believe I have made great strides in reinventing myself.  We must put our focus on other people and their needs and not so much on ourselves. Others must come first!

Several years ago when Ross Perot was running for President he was on stage with George W. Bush and Bill Clinton when he made a comment where he finished his statement by saying, “I’m all ears.” It was funny because his ears appear large but what he said rings true.  Others are all ears when it comes to your reputation.

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What makes a poor reputation? Choices made poorly are always the beginning of poor reputations.  Selfish habits and dishonesty will always result in a poor reputation.

Having a poor reputation or a bad reputation is hard to overcome but not impossible. It takes time to build or rebuild anything. You have to first decide what kind of person you want to be known as and begin building a foundation.

5 ways to Begin a Great Foundation for your Future Reputation

  1. Set a Goal to become the best that you can be and take the first step today.
  2. Think of others first and how your actions can help them to be a success.
  3. Always go above and beyond, be neat, professional, and on time.
  4. Speak well of others, do not gossip ANY. Become a Positive Speaking Person.
  5. Be Honest, Have Integrity, Do what you say you will do, and finally Love Others.Total Sum

Becoming a person of good reputation is like painting a house. You may not like the color or the existing paint may be fading. You have decided to give the house a makeover and new paint. Consider the costs and the work involved, it is worth it. It doesn’t happen overnight but it can happen in a season. Maybe this is your season right now. Think of how others will react when you decide to be the best you that you can be.

Everywhere you go, there are folks watching you and waiting for you to succeed or fail. Become the success that they expect. Be a role model for those who look up to you. You may feel that you are the underdog and no once cares but that isn’t true.  When you become a person who is trying to do the right thing, it may be tough at first but hold on to your values that you set and it will become easier. Don’t let others pull you down by talking about how you use to be, hold on and you will become stronger that ever.

Let the words you speak be the person you want to be.  Speak Strong Words of Confidence. Empower others with your words of Encouragement. Let the reputation of your life go before you and others will be glad to know you. Become a role model for others.

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ThePowerOfPositiveSpeaking.com

Words Can Heal or Destroy

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“Words are actions and actions can heal or destroy. Make your actions ones those that heal others and in doing so you create a better world.”

 

Have you ever had someone say something that hurt your feelings? It’s true isn’t it that words can hurt and can even destroy.  

I overheard a mother talking to her child one day in an attempt to discipline her little boy. Now please know that the word discipline doesn’t mean to punish, it is a word that means to guide and instill the right path. In her attempt to get the boy to do the right thing she used this phrase, “Quit being stupid and do it right.” To that little boy those words were negative and hurtful. Did my mother just tell me that when I’m not doing something right, then I am stupid. What a wrong way to bring up a child in a world where success depends on how we look at ourselves. Another simple phrase is, “That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.” Or then there is this one, “Can’t you do anything right?” 

The words you speak to another are giving direction to their next step. It’s true that the thing they were doing may not have been right but in addressing the negative we are also telling that person that if they don’t succeed, their only other option is defeat, failure, destruction.

Words are Actions not only for Children but for our Friends 

We have to realize that when we speak to someone, or when they ask for advice they may take the direction in which we lead them. Do we want to lead them down the road of destruction or to a place of success? Offer good advice if you know of it but be careful because the advice you give may not be GOOD.  We shouldn’t put ourselves into the position to offer words of hate, revenge, failure, violence. That is too often the selfish way out of a problem. Sometimes it feels good to the soul if we can get revenge or blame someone else.  Only give good advice.  Sometimes we don’t know what type of advice to give and we may agree with the other person while they are venting.  

Choose Good Words to Speak Life and Healing

In the Bible are many things that speak about our words and conversations.

Job 33:13, “My words declare the uprightness of my heart and what my lips know they speak sincerely.”

Proverbs 12:25, “Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs him down, but a good word makes him glad.

When we speak to a child or to a friend, know that Your Words Can Heal or Destroy. Take the utmost care in what you say and how you say it because someones life may depend on it. I heard a story of how some children at school were being rude to another child and even began to tell him that he should go home and kill himself. The sad thing is that one day he did kill himself just because of the cruelty of others. What would have happened had someone encouraged him to be their friend or spent a few minutes of their day speaking words of encouragement or better yet stood up for him and told a teacher of the problems. 

In the Bible, Paul says in Ephesians 4 not to let any corrupt word come out of our mouths. He says to let all bitterness, wrath, anger, clamor, and evil speaking be put away from us. 

When we offer direction, good advice, counseling in any form we should look for the future of what the outcome may be. Sometimes we may not have the correct advice to give but don’t let that stop you from good encouragement. You may not be able to solve the other persons problems but also don’t become a part of that problem by offering poor advice.  Be a friend to others and listen but don’t allow yourself to feed into the problem by continually being a sounding board. You may have to speak up and tell that other person that you recognize there is a problem that demands an immediate action. Instead of just listening to them complain, ask them what they have don’t to come out of that situation, what are their plans to overcome, what advice would they give to someone in the same situation.

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Finally, there is power in Prayer: Sometimes the mind of man can’t solve the problems of man.  I also believe in prayer for situations. The Bible says in Matthew 18:20 that prayer between two or three will result in God being there with them. Find a good Godly friend and talk with them. Allow God to lead you and guide you through the daily encounters of situations and problems that may come our way. 

Going the Extra Mile

I have a Fantastic Story that I want to share about a young lady who went the Extra Mile. I was on a return trip from Central Virginia recently where I had just given a KeyNote speech for an Awards Meeting of Correctional Professionals and was craving a Frosty from Wendys Restaurant. It seems that I get a lot of inspiration from stopping at restaurants.   google-site-verification: googlea1820d523b3644ec.html

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I pulled in to the Wendys at a midpoint in Central Virginia, gathered my money and went inside. I knew I wanted a Frosty but I wasn’t sure if I wanted the Vanilla or Chocolate. The waitress was waiting on a Father and Son so I waited my turn. I noticed that the waitress had a smile on her face that was such a delight to be in the presence of.  When my turn came, I stepped up to the counter and she so politely asked what I would like to order.

I told her that I knew I wanted a Frosty but please give me a minute to make up my mind. I told her that I didn’t know if I wanted the Chocolate or Vanilla and she immediately said, “I can do it half and half.”  She just solved my problem, and not only that but she said it with a cheerful smile like she had just solved all the world issues.

I was delighted not only by the suggestion but also in that she had responded so quickly to help me make up my mind. Now there was no one behind me so I knew she wasn’t trying to hurry me up and she really took an interest in trying to help me.

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This is exactly what the world needs, people that are willing to help and love what they do.  I immediately commented to her that her attitude and her quick response to help me was such a joy.  Wouldn’t it be so nice if every one acted like this young lady?  She was so eager to help, she was delighted that I was so pleased by her response that we both laughed.  I quickly said, “Well darling, why don’t you just make me that half and half Frosty.”

Friends, even while writing this I am still elated to see young people like this waitress who honestly want to help others.  Enthusiasm comes from the heart and is a special talent. Did you know that the word Enthusiasm comes from two Greek Words? En means “from within” and Theo comes from the study of “God”. So when we say Enthusiasm we are saying “I personally behold God on the inside”  Wow.

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We talked for a few minutes and I told her how proud of her I was that she had such a great attitude. Her name is “TyKaijah”, I thought that was such a pretty name and one to remember.  I asked to speak to her manager who was named, “Wendy”.  How funny, (Wendy and she works at Wendys.) I asked the Manager if she accepted compliments on  behalf of her employees and of course she said yes. I bragged on TyKaijah and mentioned to the manager that she should hire more individuals like her with a good outlook on life.

Yes, I believe we need to brag on those people who display such a great attitude about work and life.  I’ve been in places and encountered people where they weren’t fun to be around and this makes your day tough.  It’s easy to give a bad review when we go into a restaurant but maybe if we gave good reviews when they certainly are good, we might encourage someone to do the thing that they did right again.

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I like what Napoleon Hill says. You can start right where you stand and apply the habit of going the extra mile by rendering more service and better service than you are now being paid for.  “The Habit of Going the Extra Mile”. Napoleon Hill is the author of Think and Grow Rich as well as the Laws of Success.

The next time you get good service, no matter where you are. Tell the person how much you liked it and tell their supervisor.  This will benefit that person many more times over.  The Power of Positive Speaking

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